Go ahead and look that monster in its big green eyes.
With holidays done and a new year begun, it is not uncommon to have “pangs of jealousy” for what others have accomplished, enjoyed or acquired. Jealousy often gets a bad rap, but don’t be so quick to look away from that green-eyed monster.
When jealousy gets repressed in shame, it can grow into chronic powerlessness and bitter envy towards others. A very human “I want” becomes an angry “| cannot have.” But when we acknowledge and sit gently with our jealous feelings, we can process them productively and let them go:
- Examine your jealousy for useful clues about what you may want. Have you been neglecting your needs or goals? Is it time to shift your priorities or find the courage to create change?
- Ask yourself if the jealousy is for want of superficial things or represents a deeper need for something inside. Consider emotional wounds that may need healing.
- When circumstances are beyond your control, allow yourself to accept and grieve what you don’t have.
- Focus on gratitude – for all that you already have in your life. The things you envy may not measure up after all.
- Avoid the trap of “comparing and despairing. “Limit exposure to social media, where others present curated versions of their lives.
- Remind yourself that you don’t need to attain what others have in order to find fulfillment within yourself.
