Dealing with Anger in a Relationship

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Dealing with Anger in a Relationship

Deciding to partner with another person is one of the most important commitments you can make in life. The decision to spend your life with someone and grow old together is something that can be infinitely rewarding. It can also bring a fair share of challenges and conflicts into your life. If you are in a committed relationship, you are sure to run into disagreements and conflicts with your significant other. It’s only natural that two different people will have differing views on certain aspects of life at some point during a marriage or relationship. How you deal with anger and disagreements is ultimately what will define your relationship. It’s not easy to forgive your partner when you feel that he or she has been hurtful, but it’s a necessary step in having a healthy marriage. Below, we will discuss a few practical and healthy ways you can deal with anger in a marriage. Family counseling in Westchester, NY, is one way to help you deal with anger and put the family first.


Talk It Out

The most important first step in dealing with anger or hurt in a relationship is to find a way to talk about how you are feeling rather than trying to ignore the pain.  Sometimes, we have a tendency to avoid tough conversations that might make us feel awkward or uncomfortable. Saying what you really feel can be difficult but it is a skill that can be learned. By NOT talking to your significant other about how you feel, the anger will build up over time and ultimately lead to larger fractures in the relationship. If you, your spouse, or your family are having trouble discussing how they truly feel, family therapy in Eastchester is a great solution.


Understand Your Own Emotions

When we hear the word anger, it typically has a very negative association. The truth is anger is a natural emotion that we all feel.   When there is a betrayal of trust, anger is a normal emotional reaction. And, quite often in intimate relationships, feeling hurt brings up old wounds and betrayals from the past in one’s family of origin. Understanding these old wounds can profoundly help one’s current relationship.  It allows a person to understand his or her own emotional vulnerabilities from the past and to therefore not hold one’s partner solely responsible for the hurt.


Affection Is Essential

Feeling angry at one’s partner makes it hard to feel affectionate and loving. It is hard work, but important to try and maintain empathy for one’s partner despite feeling angry.  Practice active listening and avoid using the word “you” in a blaming way when trying to talk through your problems with your partner.

If you have decided that your relationship is beyond repair and that it is time to split with your partner, it’s important to take the time to process what has happened. Divorce recovery counseling in Westchester, NY, may help. The Counseling Center is available to help in this important process.