How did it ever get to this? The question so many couples ask themselves once the honeymoon phase of a relationship fades. For some, that stage hits a month or two into dating. For others, ten months, and for others, several years. Every couple is different, and it’s common to have disagreements. But that doesn’t mean these disagreements have to define the two of you from this point forward. And with the proper guidance, you can go back to the day you first fell in love with one another. If you’ve been unsure as to whether you and your significant other need couples counseling, here are a few signs that it might be a good idea.
Fighting In Public
You know you shouldn’t do it. You’ve seen other couples doing it and thought to yourself, I would never do that. But here you are. With couples counseling, you’ll learn to recognize and understand your triggers, so that when you feel them coming on, you’ll know how to respond more calmly, so that the two of you can find a solution together, as opposed to having a yelling contest in the middle of the street.
Culture and upbringing define people more than they realize. Language is a tricky thing, and sometimes, the words you use may mean something totally different to you than what they mean to your partner. It’s easy to mask how we really feel with clever phrasing. All too often people hurt one another without ever having any intention of doing so. A couples counselor can help translate, so both parties can truly understand the underlying message each actually wants to send to the other.
There’s An Elephant In The Room
Do you find yourself cringing every time your partner does something, yet you refrain from addressing it because you don’t think it’s worth it to resolve? The longer you wait, the worse it will get. Those little quirks are like ticking time bombs. And if you’re not comfortable enough with your significant other to be honest about them, then you will pay for it later. With a professional helping walk you through how to confront your partner in a mature and respectful way, you can get to the bottom of those issues and leave the tension at the door.
Lack Of Progress
There’s nothing more frustrating than encountering the same problems over and over again. Everyone always thinks the other hasn’t sacrificed anything. If you keep coming back to the same fights, there’s a problem. That doesn’t mean it can’t be fixed though. All it means is that a bit of help is needed to figure out why the two of you haven’t moved on from this problem yet.
There’s no shame in needing a bit of help. Relationships are complicated and confusing for everyone. There’s no right or wrong way to handle things. But by seeking a bit of perspective from a professional, the two of your can ensure a happier future. Call the Counseling Center at 914-793-3388 to set up an appointment for our couples counseling Westchester services.